Nov 18, 2008

Oh my god, i am so tired I think I am going to collapse in a little heap.

Elliot is sick. He has a virus. I feel bad for him, while at the same
time selfishly wanting him to get better JUST SO I CAN SLEEP AT NIGHT.
Every night in the middle of the night his fever shoots up, and then
he can't sleep, so up gets Mommy, and there's rocking, and there's
nursing, and there's pain reliever, and there's sometimes a cool bath,
and then, about an hour and a half later, he goes back to sleep.

I think I'm gonna die.

On the positive front, the Dr tells me these things normally last only
about 72-84 hours, so tonight should be the last night I have to deal
with it. Unless Elliot chooses to be exceptional.

While I sit in the rocking chair in the middle of the night, trying
not to start crying right along with Elliot, I think of things I am
going to write in my next life in the slow lane email. Then I forget
them, because it's three o'clock in the friggin morning, what do you
expect? But I have remembered a couple of things:

I have some bits of advice I'm going to start giving to expectant
parents, and I thought I would share them with all of you, for your
approval.

1) Don't ever talk to anyone about how THEIR child slept/is sleeping.
If their child is now 37 years old and has never slept through the
night yet it will fill you with despair; and if their baby is already
sleeping through the night at the ripe age of 5 days old it will make
you re-think your position on gun control laws.

2) In a corollary, do not let anyone give you advice on how to make
your baby sleep better. Person A will solemnly tell you that feeding
your darling offspring horse dung three times a day will make them
sleep like a rock, and Person B will just as solemnly tell you that
feeding your baby horse dung will actually magically transform them
into a Cthulhu-like squid being. They are BOTH WRONG. Everyone knows
that feeding your baby horse dung grants them the ability to fly and
sprinkle fairy dust, but has no effect on their sleeping habits.

3) One day your charming, magical, delightful, wonderful baby will sit
in the middle of the floor and scream for 15 minutes because you
handed him the blue spoon when he wanted the red spoon. Don't take it
personally. He's learning to express himself. Once he understands
English you will get your turn to express YOURself. When that chance
comes attempt to keep the swearing to a minimum.

4) Wear pants with a fitted waist band, a belt, or at least a
drawstring. Just trust me on this one.

5) Tiny hands that crawl on the floor in winter get VERY cold. Guard your bits.


I'm sure there were more of these, but I think I've forgotten most of them.

Elliot is refusing to walk. I'm not really sure why, it's clear that
he can - he does it when he forgets he's doing it, and he can walk
really fast just barely holding on to one of my hands - he just
doesn't WANT to. It's okay with me, I know he'll get around to it
eventually, but he was so DESPERATE to walk just a few months ago, it
seems odd that he's stalled out now that the only thing keeping him
from walking is lack of will.

What else on the Elliot front? He's taller, he can't walk under the
table anymore without banging his head (umm, when I say walk I mean
holding on to a chair, since, clearly, we just covered that he's not
ACTUALLY walking.) Waxor thinks he's getting another tooth in, but I
haven't seen it yet, and don't care enough to go looking for it. He's
eating a wide variety of things, or rather, he was four days ago
before he started to get sick. He LOVES music, and will start waving
his hands rhythmically whenever a song he likes is playing. Oh, and
he's finally made friends with Chimbasa, through the expedient
procedure of taking at least half of all of his food and throwing it
on the floor. Needless to say, Bito now follows him around devotedly.


Waxor is slightly less tired than I am. He's getting a lot more
sleep, but he's far less used to having it interrupted, and it has
been for the past three nights, so he's pretty wiped. He still has a
job, and will until at least after the new year, but if things aren't
looking up for Skyward at that point he'll probably go ahead adn start
looking for something new. He's been spending most of his time that
he isn't at work playing World of Warcraft, the expansion pack came
out last Thursday and it's been difficult to tear him away. :) His
family is coming down for Thanksgiving, it's nice that they live close
enough to do that.

MY family visit is a little less than a month away at this point. I
can't wait to take Elliot to Nicaragua for the first time. I'm kind
of getting overloaded trying to make sure I don't forget anything he's
going to need in Nica, I'm kinda in winter mode right now, and will
liekly totally fail to pack appropriately. Speaking of which, Momma
and Been, expect an email asking some questions maybe later today.

Now I am going to go pick up the living room, which looks something
like a yogurt covered tornado hit it.

Yeah, go ahead try to visualize that.